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Games to explore your love language with your partner

Updated: May 13, 2023

Are you in a stable, long-term relationship? Or maybe you are starting to date somebody and would like to explore together and get to know each other more intimately? Or maybe you are just curious to test how much you and your partner know about each other! In any case, this game is made to explore your initmacy in a safe context and it could help you express your needs and preferences, as well as to understand your partner’s better.

Rule number 1: all participants have to willingly commit to be honest in their answers and be open-minded about the other person’s answers. Remember: this is a safe space!

Sexuality is generally a taboo topic for many people, specially for women. Society teaches us that it is something shameful and embarrassing and that we should not share our desires openly. This is absolutely false. Communication is key in this matter, because you are responsible for your own needs and your pleasure but your partner can’t read your mind!

Rule number 2: Consent is vital. We must communicate what we want to do and the other person must agree to engage in that activity. If any of those things doesn’t happen, we should not participate in that activity at all.

Questionnaire exchange

Each person has to write their answers to these questions about themselves and then show them to their partner.

  • From 1-10, how important is initmacy in your life at the moment? Other areas you can compare it to are friendships, personal growth, health, hobbies or leisure.

  • From 1-10, how important would you like your intimacy to be in your life? It can be the same as it is now, it can be more important, or it can be less important. No judgment here!

  • Which initimate activities would you like to explore with your partner? You can include here any fantasy you feel comfortable sharing.

  • Which intimate activities are a red line you are not willing to cross? Is there any space for negotiation if this is one of your partner’s biggest fantasies? Remember: consent is key, so if the answer is “no negotiation possible”, that is also fine and your partner should understand that.

  • What is the main source of your need for intimate close-ups? Choose one or more of the following (or add your own reason if it’s not here):

[ ] Express love

[ ] Experience physical pleasure

[ ] Have fun

[ ] Release tension and relax

[ ] Feel desired by other people

[ ] Obtain affection

[ ] Bond spiritually with my partner

[ ] Create a moment of intimacy and complicity

[ ] Have children

How well do you know your partner?

Each person has to answer these questions about their partner:

  • Name all sensitive body parts of your partner

  • Name all body parts your partner prefers you not to stimulate

  • Name your partner’s preferred intimate activity

  • What do you think your partner feels when they give you pleasure

After showing your answers to your partner, how many of these did you get right and how many you had no clue about? Take the correct answers as signs of healthy communication and the incorrect answers as motivation to learn more about your partner’s needs. 😊

Game for months: the jar of wishes!

  1. Each person has to write at least 10 things they would like to practice more often, try for the first time, do to their partner, or receive from their partner. Each activity is written in a different piece of paper and all the papers go into a jar.

  2. Wishes must be clear and very specific.

  3. Whenever you feel like granting a wish to your partner, pick a paper from their jar. If everybody is ok with doing that activity in that moment, you can throw away the paper. If not, you can put the paper back for another occasion and pick another paper. Also, if anybody does not want to engage in that activity ever, you can put the paper into a different jar and talk about it with your partner.

  4. Empty those jars and enjoy your wishes and your partner’s! If you both liked it, you can always repeat with new wishes 😉

We hope you will find these games fun and useful. After all, they are supposed to bring you closer together and improve your mutual relations and mutual respect. Let us know if you try any and how it went!

#getready, enjoy your time with your partner and let your moments together be based on mutual understanding.


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